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Sex before marriage
#31
in "Bible Times", there were 3 "marriages".
1. For the two people to be aloowed to have sex.
Once the woman concieved, a second "marriage" was performed.
The 3rd. and final "marriage" was performed when the child was born healthy.
If the woman remained "barren" , the Marriage commitment was null and void.
In today's sorely lacking morals , and a do as you please mentallity, sadly many children are aborted, grow up in a one caretaker homes, Left in garbage cans to die, given up for adoption, and now even sold on the internet !

What you speak of is guilt, not sin. The Family is no longer an important factor in our lives. Which will prove to society's detriment. Ok, call me "Old Fashioned" , I happen to believe in the sanctity of marriage. Although, I am sure that I am in the minority here.

Sex has been blown way the heck out of purportion, making THE ONLY thing that matters in a relationship. You can have great sex, but if you can't communicate, so what ? We are bombarded everywhere with sex, commercials, tv, movies. Like it should be the only thing that we need to concern ourselves about.

What about Love, Companionship, Trust ? Do you how many lonely people are out there right now ? I guess , the bottom line is you make a choice. You either can live with the choices you make or you can't. God has nothing to do with it.
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#32
For me sex isn't something dirty and something to feel bad about, it's human nature, it's natural. Sex for me is a way of showing my love towards someone, especially for someone who can't communicate vocally the best, making love says all the right words.

Sex before marriage I don't agree with really, one night stands I certainly do not agree with either. Sex with someone you love, of course go right ahead.

Don't ever feel bad about doing something that comes naturally to you because of the stigma it gets from religion, if you feel it's right then it will be, only you know what's right for you, don't let anyone else determine that for you.

I'm glad you shared, it's not good to bottle things up.


Stacey
"If at first you don't succeed...re-define success"

"It's not how many years of experience you have...it's how much experience are in the years."

"If in doubt...google!" - SweetyStacey

"Love will find a way..." - The Lion King 2

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#33
Yes, i DID IT OUT OF LOVE, BUT WE SPLIT A FEW MONTHS AGO DUE TO SOME TERRIBLE THINGS HE DID TO ME (sorry, its quiet personal), so thats why I wanted to know. Its hard to live with myself for making love to a person I thought i was going to spend the rest of my life with, only to find out thats not whats gonna happen
Ignorance is Bliss but Knowledge is Power
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#34
(09-20-2010, 06:20 AM)Jenova Wrote: Yes, i DID IT OUT OF LOVE, BUT WE SPLIT A FEW MONTHS AGO DUE TO SOME TERRIBLE THINGS HE DID TO ME (sorry, its quiet personal), so thats why I wanted to know. Its hard to live with myself for making love to a person I thought i was going to spend the rest of my life with, only to find out thats not whats gonna happen

Yes i've been there, was with a guy for almost 5 years, was engaged for 3 of them, obviously thought it was for real but then he made a selfish life choice and left. I don't feel bad for making love to him, cause it was right at the time.

Things don't always work out but the choices you make allow you to live and learn, in life you can't always see what's at the end of the tunnel but you have to make a choice for the now and you did which was right for you.


Stacey
"If at first you don't succeed...re-define success"

"It's not how many years of experience you have...it's how much experience are in the years."

"If in doubt...google!" - SweetyStacey

"Love will find a way..." - The Lion King 2

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#35
Honestly, thank you, I really mean that, it sounds like we have experienced exactly the same thing, I hope that you are ok now, I did what I thought was right at the time, and I'll take responsibility for my actions if I am persecuted for it.

Thank you again
Ignorance is Bliss but Knowledge is Power
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#36
You're welcome. Like the others have said I don't think you will be punished for your actions. In my opinion all god can ask for is for you to do what you feel is right FOR YOU, if you did something and knew it was wrong then yes maybe you would be judged, but you didn't you did what you thought was right so there should be no judgment based on that.

And yes, I am good now. In a better place, thank you.


Stacey
"If at first you don't succeed...re-define success"

"It's not how many years of experience you have...it's how much experience are in the years."

"If in doubt...google!" - SweetyStacey

"Love will find a way..." - The Lion King 2

Reply
#37
Is there anyone but me seeing how religion is destroying your human nature and your mental stability? Sex is natural - want it, have it. Marriage is just paperwork, nothing more. Oh please...
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#38
(09-19-2010, 01:41 PM)Reverend Mother Wrote: in "Bible Times", there were 3 "marriages".
1. For the two people to be aloowed to have sex.
Once the woman concieved, a second "marriage" was performed.
The 3rd. and final "marriage" was performed when the child was born healthy.
If the woman remained "barren" , the Marriage commitment was null and void.
In today's sorely lacking morals , and a do as you please mentallity, sadly many children are aborted, grow up in a one caretaker homes, Left in garbage cans to die, given up for adoption, and now even sold on the internet !

What you speak of is guilt, not sin. The Family is no longer an important factor in our lives. Which will prove to society's detriment. Ok, call me "Old Fashioned" , I happen to believe in the sanctity of marriage. Although, I am sure that I am in the minority here.

Sex has been blown way the heck out of purportion, making THE ONLY thing that matters in a relationship. You can have great sex, but if you can't communicate, so what ? We are bombarded everywhere with sex, commercials, tv, movies. Like it should be the only thing that we need to concern ourselves about.

What about Love, Companionship, Trust ? Do you how many lonely people are out there right now ? I guess , the bottom line is you make a choice. You either can live with the choices you make or you can't. God has nothing to do with it.

Actually by Old Testament biblical standards once you 'lay with' a woman you have taken her as a wife and are bound to her by God in what is understood today as a marriage. Being married was simple, have intercourse and you were under the covenant for a lifetime.

Most often the 'wedding ceremony' to share in the new commitment under God didn't happen until well after the private consecratory act and was intended to celebrate the couple's new life together with friends and family. That cermony was many times delayed until the expecting of or bith of a child...so that family and friends could be involved with the child as well. Those later celebrations were much like our idea of a baby shower in historical times...not a wedding.

Jenova, as a woman you were created in a specific way. You are supposed to feel bound to your sexual partner very deeply under God's covenant of the man/woman partnership. If you live by God's rules and not man's...your spirit responds as a wife. That bond is strong. What you are feeling I suspect is less in regard to mankind's rules of sin...and more about a woman left alone with the broken yoke of that marital covenant under God. What you feel is the loss of that covenant, a divorce in fact in the eyes of God...and that is a very spiritually wounding trauma.

Man created a marriage ceremony, and man created the practice of providing a woman with a 'certificate of divorce'. Man frowned upon sex before marriage, where God said intecourse means you are married.

Personally, I choose to listen to God not mankind. And Jenova? Jesus has already prepared, cleansed and renewed you in forgiveness in regard to that broken yoke...you can enter into that bond with the right man in the future without guilt and knowing you are purified. Feel free to wear white to your future wedding. Icontexto-emoticons-04-032x032
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#39
Ive always believed that God takes into account that his word was written thousands of years ago so adjust with the times so long as u keep his laws you should be good. I for one never believe these girls who "save themselves for marriage". Thats impractical since as human we are bombarded with sex from every direction. Ive yet to meet someone who can hold sex off for marriage. Its literally impossible.
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#40
i believe that marriage is basically telling everybody that you are gonna have sex with the same person for the rest of your life, plus, asking God his blessing and recognition, it's about fidelity, that said, if you have sex before you get married and still have sex with the same person for the rest of your life, it's totally ok.
that is my opinion, because, i think marriage is overrated, i mean, if i have sex with a person and keep having sex with this person (only) for the rest of my life, move in together and have kids, why is that wrong? modern day's relationships lifestyle is becoming more and more incompatible with the marriage event.
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