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Visitation dream or something else
#1
Hi Folks,

I'm new here and this is my first post.  Here goes, my stepdaughter passed away in August of 2018.  She was 37 years old and had battled substance abuse for many years.  Sadly, for the last two years before her passing she was estranged from me and a few other family members.  I was the one who outed her substance abuse problem some years back (she tried, like many addicts to conceal her addiction), ever since that time she resented me and broke off all contact.  When I first me her, she was 22 y.o. and we had established a close relationship and I grew to love her very much.  Tragically, her addiction issues caused her to become distanced from those who loved her and only closer to the people who she did drugs with.  It wasn't long after her passing that some unusual things started to happen.  One of those was a vivid dream I had, it went as follows:  I was in the house getting ready to go to her funeral when I noticed her in an adjacent room walking around and getting dressed.  I guess because I was in a dream state, this didn't seem too unusual, but I walked into the room to see her.  She was half nude and getting dressed, and she appeared as a cadaver.  Now, my stepdaughter was a beautiful woman, a beauty contest winner and professional model, so to see her, looking white in color and a slight bit decayed, was sad and somewhat shocking.  But again, I was dreaming so I wasn't grossed out or scared, just sad to see her that way.  After a few moments, she turned and saw me, she said, "Hi Dan" and walked toward me and gave me a kiss on the cheek.  I gave her a little peck on the cheek back, you could still see her original beauty, but in finding her appearance so deteriorated, I could barely kiss her back.  I woke up a few moments later.  

The dream troubles me a bit.  My stepdaughter always would go out of her way to look her best, and despite her drug issues, she always dressed fashionably and did her makeup to show off her beauty.  If that was her in my dream...a visitation dream...I don't think she would want to have me see her that way?  Or maybe, that was her way of saying: Look, I'm dead now, but this is the best I can do to reconcile with you.    I don't know what to make of it.  I do know this, I miss her immeasurably, and will forever be saddened that she passed without a reconciliation between us.  Be interested in hearing some of your insights into this encounter...if it was one...or just your thoughts.  Thanks in advance for reading.  Dan
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#2
Hi Dan, I'm sorry for your loss. It is hard losing a loved one - from the substance abuse, as well as the tragic finality of her passing.

These are my thoughts from personal experience. Dreams can be a result of eating just before bedtime - the food fuels and stimulates the brain and it goes into hyperactitivty. Most of the time, dreams are only dreams; a montage of impressions that the mind is sorting out and reviewing. That's why they can be a series of confused images and can be funny, peculiar or scary, depending on what has been going on. These are the dreams I tend to forget when I wake up.

Sometimes, a dream might contain a message that our subconscious self could be trying to tell us. A decision or a truth that we haven't admitted to our waking selves. That's when a dream dictionary might be helpful in deciphering hidden meanings. I've attached these links for your reference. Hopefully, you might find something of relevance:
https://www.auntyflo.com/dream-dictionary/dead
https://www.auntyflo.com/dream-dictionary/daughter

I think the state in which you saw you stepdaughter was a reflection of your sadness and regret on how the substance abuse had affected her health. But the fact that she showed you affection is a good sign - love remains. She was getting dressed and you were getting ready for her funeral. Perhaps she had come to say her farewell because you were grieving and needed closure.

I've had a few visitations from family members who have passed away. Each time they felt very real and I remember details like the sound of the voice and the words spoken, even after all these years. There were also some corresponding incidents and odd coincidences that made these dreams noteworthy.

Whether or not you had a true visitation, that is for you to decide because the experience was uniquely yours. What does your gut feeling tell you?
There's life...and then there's the afterlife.
[-] The following 1 user says Thank You to Jadeite for this post:
  • dannym1965
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#3
(02-20-2019, 09:50 PM)Jadeite Wrote: Hi Dan, I'm sorry for your loss. It is hard losing a loved one - from the substance abuse, as well as the tragic finality of her passing.

These are my thoughts from personal experience. Dreams can be a result of eating just before bedtime - the food fuels and stimulates the brain and it goes into hyperactitivty. Most of the time, dreams are only dreams; a montage of impressions that the mind is sorting out and reviewing. That's why they can be a series of confused images and can be funny, peculiar or scary, depending on what has been going on. These are the dreams I tend to forget when I wake up.

Sometimes, a dream might contain a message that our subconscious self could be trying to tell us. A decision or a truth that we haven't admitted to our waking selves. That's when a dream dictionary might be helpful in deciphering hidden meanings. I've attached these links for your reference. Hopefully, you might find something of relevance:
https://www.auntyflo.com/dream-dictionary/dead
https://www.auntyflo.com/dream-dictionary/daughter

I think the state in which you saw you stepdaughter was a reflection of your sadness and regret on how the substance abuse had affected her health. But the fact that she showed you affection is a good sign - love remains. She was getting dressed and you were getting ready for her funeral. Perhaps she had come to say her farewell because you were grieving and needed closure.

I've had a few visitations from family members who have passed away. Each time they felt very real and I remember details like the sound of the voice and the words spoken, even after all these years. There were also some corresponding incidents and odd coincidences that made these dreams noteworthy.

Whether or not you had a true visitation, that is for you to decide because the experience was uniquely yours. What does your gut feeling tell you?
Thank you Jadeite, for your kind words.  I definitely feel like it was her, the sense of her being there was so strong and vivid.  I'm familiar with dream interpretation since I often go into a deep REM sleep in the evening.  Perhaps from the protein shakes I take before bedtime as part of my nightly routine.  The dream with my Stepdaughter also occurred when other unusual things were going on around me.  For instance, following her death, her picture would almost constantly appear on my computer's picture scroll.  Now, there's a few hundred photos stored in my computer of various things, work, hobbies, family etc. and my computer randomly scrolls them out for review, but her picture was coming up every single time, and that's never happened.  Also, my stepdaughter left behind two children, an eight year old son, and a nine month old daughter.  The day I was consulting with my attorney in regards to my wife and I adopting baby Adrianna (my late stepdaughter's infant daughter) I begin receiving phone calls on my cell phone from a non existent number.  My phone's caller ID just read "1".   When I picked up there was no one there.  My phone never did this before and it's not broken or malfunctioning in any other way.   The most overt signs of her presence was actually seeing her apparition in my home.  I was up late one night working in my office when to my left, in the partially lit hallway, I caught a fleeting glimpse of a tall, slender woman with a Bob hairstyle walk into the guest room.  It was so startling I almost walked over to the guest room to see if someone was in there.  Although undefined in features (I only caught a glance), that was my stepdaughter's physical appearance.  It was her.  And all of this from someone like myself, who leans toward the skeptical when it comes to paranormal phenomena.  

I've also gone to see a Psychic, which is a huge leap for me since I never really placed much credence in readers.  Well, this woman, told me things that only me and my stepdaughter could know between us, and told me things about my family that only myself and a few other family members could know about.  She said your stepdaughter is around, she's in a good place right now on the other side, and she wants my wife and I to adopt and raise her daughter, it's something my wife and I want very badly as well so we're working through the courts right now to do just that.  

Where am I at this point?  A much firmer believer in the paranormal to be sure!  And the existence of another plane of life that comes after the passing of our physical bodies in this life.  Thanks for your input Jadeite, let's stay in touch.  Take care, Dan
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#4
Dan, I'm glad that you found some comfort in what I said. It's odd that your dream happened around the time as those other incidences with your computer, phone and the glimpse of your Stepdaughter. Once or twice might be happenstance, three or more certainly seem more than mere coincidences.

If these happenings help you feel you are on the right track towards fulfilling your Stepdaughter's wishes, then that could be the message for you. I've found that if I do my best, with the best of intentions, then if things are meant to be, everything will fall into place.

My best wishes to you and your family. This is a time of healing for all of you. Take care of yourselves.
There's life...and then there's the afterlife.
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#5
(04-07-2019, 09:28 PM)Jadeite Wrote: Dan, I'm glad that you found some comfort in what I said. It's odd that your dream happened around the time as those other incidences with your computer, phone and the glimpse of your Stepdaughter. Once or twice might be happenstance, three or more certainly seem more than mere coincidences.

If these happenings help you feel you are on the right track towards fulfilling your Stepdaughter's wishes, then that could be the message for you. I've found that if I do my best, with the best of intentions, then if things are meant to be, everything will fall into place.

My best wishes to you and your family. This is a time of healing for all of you. Take care of yourselves.
Thanks again Jadeite.
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