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My Sleep Paralysis Story
Several years ago, when I was a sophomore in college, I had been going through one of the most difficult times of my life. I had had a falling out with the first love of my life, and I was ambitious enough to train every day for collegiate sports to keep myself busy. Like I’m sure many people do during these trying times in their lives, I did a little soul searching that included practicing meditation on top of the dream journaling I had already been doing for years. This enhanced the frequency in which I dreamt dramatically. I would nap after practice having had three to four dreams. I would sometimes dream for so long that I never felt like I had slept, having a combination of regular and lucid dreams. It became somewhat of a daily routine, perhaps an addiction and an escape.
And then I woke up. Those were the words I would cycle endlessly through my mind while listening to the same 15 minute guided meditation each day. This remained the routine for several months that year, until one night changed everything.
I threw on my headphones. Placed on the guided meditation. I laid on my back and centered the energy into each part of my body, and experienced a deep relaxation. Almost as soon as I felt myself leave my wakened state, I immediately jolted my eyes open. My body felt different. Not as relaxed as I had just been. The high level of mental acuity, not nearly as quiet as I had felt a moment before. My room was darker than before, as if my eyes had lost the adjustment to the darkness they just had. Loud noises were coming from another room. An argument, perhaps. I was aware it was too late for anyone to be awake, so the arguing sparked my curiosity. I had to go make sure everything was alright, but I was paralyzed. Fear surged through my body deeper than I had ever experienced in my life. Terror. Petrification. Helplessness. I was aware of this dream, this dream that had become more than I had bargained for.
A presence was with me. The sense that you feel when you catch a football, but can sense the footsteps of someone approaching even though you had never heard or seen them. It was an evil, eerie, god-forsaken sense of knowing I was not alone in my room. It was so frightening, the evil. I turned my head to the left and saw a dark shadow figure that seemed to be kneeling and staring at me. It had hollow black eyes and its mouth drooped and released a terrible sound. It was pure black, but there was some white that I can remember on its face. Truly the being of my nightmares had found me at last.
I slowly forced my head straight, so I could look away from this scary thing and immediately began to open my mouth and scream. With all of my might, strength and energy I attempted to propel myself into a sitting-up position while laying on my back in my bed. Numbness. My fear had given me such a jolt of immense energy that I somehow, somehow (so thankful) sat up and regained partial control of myself in my dream. I was screaming in an upward position, screaming silent because my voice was blanketed, muffled and partially silenced in my dream. While I’m sitting up still screaming, the craziest phenomenon I have ever physically felt occurred. I PHASED back into reality. The world around me shifted like water rippled through a wave. A swift ripple of color, as the color began to revisit the room that had been darkened in my dream. As the colors returned, my voice could finally be heard from my ears and it was a loud scream. So loud that I immediately had to silence myself, so as not to wake anyone else in my house.
The overwhelming feeling of a lingering evil persisted for quite some time. I was so scared from this experience that I have never meditated or desired to revisit my days of ethereal exploration. The entire day, I was scared about having to go back into my bed and sleep in the same room (I ended up lying on my couch). Hell, for that entire week I was overcome by a feeling of dread. I am telling my story because for those of you who may struggle with this, you are brave. I dearly wish that you may find the peace that you deserve.
It's too bad that you gave up meditation. Sometimes when defenses are lowered to let the good in, then the bad can also come through. There are simple measures you could take to prevent this from happening again. Most importantly, try not to let this episode ruin your experience of deep meditation and peace.

Also, if you awake from a nightmare (lucid, paralyzingly, night terror, what have you), be sure to sit up and turn your pillow around. This will help you to break from the episode and not return to the nightmare you just woke from.
you can use chi or shield

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